Christmas! The work week that preceded it was hellish in its own right. I was the only tractor driver for the last few days, and there was much work to be done. I soldiered on, somehow, and managed to finish it with only a minimum of frustration.

Christmas Eve, after work, I picked up the missus and took off to my parents house. We exchanged gifts, and such fine gifts they were! I got a surround sound system that put my previous setup to shame. No less than a thousand watts of power with a subwoofer that actually does what it’s supposed to. I set it up the following morning and I was not disappointed. It has a self-calibration function, wherein you place the microphone where you’re sitting and it adjusts the volume levels accordingly. It had the subwoofer’s levels set at +0.0dB, but I saw fit to increase that number to +6.0dB, which was as high as it would go. Rest assured, if I could have turned it up to eleven, I would have.

I got the warmest socks imaginable, gloves, balaclavas with the lower jaw of a skull printed on them (totally badass), a knitted toque, and an abundance of candy. I also got to speak with my brother on Christmas morning, which is always nice. He’s doing well, and my heart is made warmer for hearing it.

I sit here now on Boxing Day, alone, my better half being scheduled to work on this, the most harrowing day for retail employees. In my pity, I coined the term “retail rape”, but thinking more on it, I am certain the term has been used before. Let’s all send her our best wishes, friends: she’ll definitely need them.

Today I plan to do little more than sit about on the computer, watch movies, enjoy the crystal clear sound that comes from them, and do a bit of cleaning up around the house. Video games are a distinct possibility, but given how much I suck at Modern Warfare 2, I may just enjoy the movies and leave it at that.

How were your holidays, kids? Tell me, in lurid detail, so that we might share in the joy that is getting free stuff in tremendous abundance.

First things firstly: I am getting back into World of Warcraft. The game’s appeal has, for whatever reason, returned to me. I have a hunter of the Night Elf variety (commence laughter) who has made it to the 28th level so far. Kaitlin has also started another character. A human paladin, level (as of this writing) 17.

The initial expectation was that we would level at an even pace (more or less), but things quickly fell apart when it became painfully obvious that I level a lot faster than she does. Hopes remain high, however. We’ll see what happens.

Yesterday, Deacon and I managed to do a bit of running around, two year old Kylie in tow, procuring the various gifts, sundries, and whatnots that would be required for the evening’s Early Christmas Gift Exchangery. By the end of it, I made off with a copy of Modern Warfare 2 and a jacket that appears to have come straight off of the set of Boondock Saints. Both are unbelievably sexy.

Having chased Kylie through half of the goddamn Walmart before cutting her off and scooping her up, we got lunch, ran another small errand or two, and went home. Kylie seemed remarkably pleased with her newfound ability to pee in a potty. Sadly, this resulted in some of the pee (proudly held in the little recepticle by her unsteady hands) landing on my laptop. The laptop was closed, thank God, and only the smallest bit of urine tainted its glossy exterior.

Such cannot be said for my back and t-shirt. She thought it a wonderful idea to pee on me when I wasn’t looking. It is the first time another human being has ever had the opportunity and the desire to do such a thing. I was appropriately amazed.

The evening was much more subdued, consisting mostly of movies and Kylie using me as a high chair while said movies were showing. I distracted her with an iPhone whilst I was busy typing something, and you can see a picture of it here:

That is all I have for you, gentle reader. May your Christmas be as merry as you could ever want. I’m certain mine will be.